Here’s an interesting summation of a traditional negotiation strategy:

Win-Win Negotiation Tips for Managers

As managers, the ability to use win-win negotiation skills can make all the difference in negotiating success. Likewise, it can be essential when influencing coworkers and facilitating constructive, positive relationships. Here are 6 things that managers should think about when preparing for a negotiation.

• Know what you want – As a manager, it’s important to go into a negotiation knowing what you want your end result to be. Make sure you put a lot of time and thought into what you want and why you want it. Remember that it is important for you to consider what’s in it for you financially, emotionally, intellectually, physically, etc. It also helps to know what you don’t want as you go deeper into negotiations.
• Know what your counterpart wants – Your counterpart will also have an agenda when he or she enters the negotiation. Make it a point to understand beforehand what he or she wants the conclusion of this negotiation to be. Understand the financial, emotional, intellectual or physical resolution that he or she is looking to walk away with.
• Anticipate objections – The negotiation process is not always easy. As a manager, you have to understand that you will meet some objections from your employee along the way. You need to prepare yourself for this by doing your due diligence prior to the negotiation. Make sure that you have relevant evidence at your fingertips with which the other party can identify and relate to.
• Identify concessions – Determine your absolute non-negotiable items and desirables and what you are willing to give and take. You are certainly not going to walk away from every negotiation with all of your needs satisfied. Negotiations are all about the give and take, and as a manager you need to be prepared to meet your employee half way.
• Determine your “walk-away” – When you determine your “walk-away,” you define the point at which there is no need to proceed with the negotiation. Prior to the start of the negotiations, you must ascertain your own “walk-away” point. This will be your single most important source of negotiating power, so once your “walk-away” point is met, you need to make sure you take action.
• Practice with a partner – As is the case with any important presentation you have ever made, you always want to practice. You could be faced with a difficult discussion and it is always best to make sure you rehearse possible outcomes. By practicing with someone else you will build your confidence with the situation and it will ultimately help the negotiation run as smoothly as possible.

~Reprinted from The Coaches Corner, Dale Carnegie Training, Copyright © 2010 Dale Carnegie & Associates, Inc. All rights reserved

From my perspective, and maybe this is heresy, but negotiations are lose/lose propositions. You’re both giving things up. If you’re lucky, you’ll give up what is least important to you and hold on to what’s most important. And that brings us to point two of this report: Know what your CounterPoint wants! This is great advice, however, when you’re dealing with a bully, you cannot predict what the bully wants. You can assume he/she wants power, control, to win, but that’s not always the case. Sometimes the bully’s aggression comes from fear of the unknown, fear of failure, frustration from poor communication skills, or the habit of making all priorities have the same weight so everything is urgent or important and therefore, the bully cannot determine where to give and where to hold firm. If the bully doesn’t know, you can’t predict. You can make some assumptions but you could easily miss the mark. 

To find out what the opposition wants, we have to get curious. Here are some questions to ask: 

• What seems most important here to me? 
• What seems most important to my opponent? 
• Are we capable of setting aside our emotions to listen to one another? 
• If we can do that, what might we hear? 
• What values are driving this negotiation? 
• What are my values, what are the bullies values? 

Values are what drives the negotiation. 

You could be arguing over 10,000 bucks but you’re really arguing over control? Saving face? Saving the world? Or, what? Do you really know? If not, then staying curious will allow you to ask: ‘So, you want x, y, z? What else is important? Then, ask yourself: Is this a win/lose, win/win, or lose/lose scenario? Negotiation assumes win/win but usually ends up lose/lose. Is this okay with you? Will your opposition settle for that or must they win? If you enter a negotiation as prepared as you think you can be but open to the idea that you will have to be curious, listen carefully, and flex with new information, as well as understand it’s really lose/lose, you’ll be prepared to negotiate.